svollga: (lesbian)
yuki_onna dissects Lady Gaga's bisexuality claim: If you only want relationships with men--and she's not only saying she's only had relationships with men in the past, but only looks for them with men now, and could never love a woman--well, you know, I have a hard time seeing what's so thrillingly queer about that.
You know, I tend to distrust any celebrity declaration of bisexuality. It seems to me that most of them (especially women) do it for titillation of the audience. I know it's not right to doubt and argue the self-identification of people, but the label they use, I use too, and what they do with it echoes with me. And a lot of them use this label but only date opposite sex in public, supporting the myth of bisexuals using their own gender for sex while marrying the opposite.
So when they call themselves bisexual but only have open visible long-term relationship with opposite sex like Lady Gaga, it makes my past and potential future same-sex relationship more fragile and 'unreal' in the other's eyes. When they call themselves bisexual but then take it back like David Bowie, it makes my orientation less valid in other's eyes. There are of course people who are doing it sort of right, like Angelina Jolie who doesn't dismiss her relationship with a woman as something less then real. But the more people represent bisexuality as something not real, the more I feel the need to defend it as real, and I don't know how, and don't actually want to defend what I am (especially as I'm not quite bisexual, I'm pansexual because gender isn't binary, and I prefer queer anyway). It's all kind of stupid.

Speaking of another sort of representation: there's a usual argument in the discussions about queer representation (or any minority representation, actually, but let's take queer for this one) that it's all very good to have queer representation, but you can't force the author, the creator, to write something they don't want to, because of the holy creative process and inspiration and so on. And on one hand, I get it. I write things, too, and I write whatever is in my head, and I don't stop to check for representation. But on the other hand, when I see yet another 'the author has the right to write whatever they have in mind' I want to scream: 'No they don't have the right to erase me and the likes of me from existence because they don't want me in their little pretty world so much that they can't even think about me and the likes of me! Stop making me invisible! LOOK at me, I'm here in this world, we are all around you, we're here, we're queer, didn't you get the memo to get used to it?'

...I think I have a period of being angry at discrimination and silencing and stuff. Not used to it.


svollga: (tv)
There's a discussion on The non-queerness of our current Who that has so. much. fail in comments, I can't stop wincing. There was a lot of win in comments, too. But fail grabbed me stronger. I'm very sensitive these days.

# It is a family show. Queers aren't allowed in a family show because they are enemies of family. Also, naughty queers.
# It's for children, not for teenagers as RTD's era was. Again, children should never see queers. They can get queer cooties. Right through the screen.
# Moffat isn't gay so he doesn't think about gay agenda when writing his stories. Minority stories are for the minorities to tell (to each other, probably) while privileged people enjoy their privilege to forget about the existence of said minorities.
# The story isn't about relationships, romance and/or love. So we can have blatantly heterosexual people all around flirting/in love/married/having families (not to mention heterosexual couple as the main characters and a wedding as a major plot point), and the story isn't about romance, but having any kind of queer representation makes it about romance.
# I watch for the story, not for romace/sexual situations. And queers can't be action characters, they are all about queer sexuality.
# Most foregrounded relationships in the series are between parents and children. And queers can't be parents. Never.
# Heterosexual relashionship aren't really in your face. But they are in background all the time, and did I mention heterosexual couple as main characters and a wedding?
# It is close to the ratio of straight/queer in real life. No, it's not, even if we take only quantity not quality (i.e. one short remark vs wedding storyline).
# I assume that River is bisexual/Eleven is asexual/character N is queer, so add it to your list. Can we please stop talking about subtext while discussing text? Subtext is in the eyes of the beholder. Those who want see it, those who don't - don't. Text is a slogan, a speech, a statement of existence. Queers were in the closet of subtext for too long. Thank you, but no.
# And my personal peeve: I'm bisexual, and I don't care whether there are queer storilines or not, because I make no difference between genders/don't look specifically for queer references. So you are okay with dating any gender but seeing only straight couples on screen? Well, I'm bi, and I'm not okay with it. Because I'm tired of feeling that one half of my sexual identity is forbidden while the other is supported by society, and that I have to choose sides. I want not to care about the gender of people kissing on my screen, but because nobody cares, not because I'm blind to the unequality and queer invisibility.

Grrr *shakes fist*
svollga: (lesbian)

I voted for AfterEllen's Hot 100, along with "companion lists", which, sadly, have only 5 places for nominees each against 10 in the main list. Here is my list of choice:

Alyson Hannigan
Catherine Tate - also in Hottest Women Over 40
Christina Cox
Freema Ageyman - also in Hottest Women of Color
Gina Torres - also in Hottest Women of Color and Hottest Women Over 40
Jennifer Beals - also in Hottest Women of Color and Hottest Women Over 40
Kirsten Vangsness - also in Hottest Out Lesbian/Bi Women (and why the hell don't they have Hottest Plus-Size Women vote?)
Meryl Streep - she should be also in Hottest Women Over 40, but I was out of place already, so I decided that she'll be there anyway, and I better vote for some less popular women
Olivia Williams - also in Hottest Women Over 40
Paget Brewster - she should also be in Hottest Women Over 40! Hell, they don't have enough place for my girls of choice. Though I didn't know she is 41 already until I checked her Wiki page.
Sadly, I somehow forgot to add Lisa Edelstein to the main list (I sometimes miss the obvious). But she's in my list of Hottest Women Over 40.

It seems that I consider women over 40 sexier. Which is sort of true - at least in a sence that they usually look on screen like women over 30 I know in real life, they have a more distinct personality, and they often have the type of body I find very appealing - tall, athletic/curvy and busty. It's one of many types of women I find attractive. Though there are many other types I find hot, but they are, sadly, under-represented on screen and among the celebreties. I also find a lot if young women attractive in real life, but on screen, not so much.

BTW, after I voted, I've found this appeal to vote for butches: The AfterEllen list has so far been extremely feminine, white, under 40, and straight. Last year, AfterEllen launched some supplemental lists, which were: women of color, women over 40, and out women. But still, no gender diversity. I already voted so I can't participate again, and though I find butch women very attractive, I don't know any celebrity butches except for Ellen. (This fact nicely illustrates the problem win gender diversity on screen.)

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December 2010

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