on TV-shows and fannish hunger

[svollga]

I've just downloaded the latest episode of Doctor Who (yes, I leave in a country where you have a choice of either download stuff from torrents or wait for ages for a legal copy), but I am not watching River Song being awesome. Which is weird because I should, but a) I want to work some more, and b) I want to finish my re-run of Criminal Minds first. What the hell happened to my priorities?

I'm watching series 3 to 5 back to back. Watching things back to back helps to see the thematic development, all the small cues that you know will develop into something later, or big things that were predicted before but you missed it, or aftershocks from the big things from the past. And it makes me feel a special fannish hunger.

It's the kind of hunger which makes you want things that were mentioned but never expanded to be expanded in all the details, and things that never happened but are possible or probable or improbable but interesting to happen. That's what fanfiction is for. To satisfy this hunger. Only in Criminal Minds fandom, it is tantalizing becaus this hunger can never be satisfied by fanfiction. And some things will never be satisfied in canon (which is part of what makes this canon so awesome, but also makes me a little sad and hungry).

Mostly, I want romance. I'm a sucker for romance, and I feel guilty about it all too often, and the I remember all the feministic and patriarchal implications of this guilt and refuse to feel it because romance isn't bad per se. Wanting romance isn't being stupid and emotional and shallow and female. It's just wanting romance. So yes, I want romance in Criminal Minds - not the kisses-and-roses kind of romance taking all the screen time, but small things like JJ and Will. Like early Hotch and Haley. Like Gideon and Sarah. And Penelope and Kevin - oh yes!
On the other hand, I sort of want some big love storyline. With someone from the team falling in love and dealing with it and with their job and the team's reaction. I want it to be either Prentiss or Hotch, because they are the two characters whom I'm interested in most of all at the moment.

Actually, I secretly want it to be Prentiss and Hotch, though it can't happen on the show, not ever. But I still like to think about it. I even read some fanfiction, but it never satisfy the hunger I have about this couple, because it's never perfect. I like their friendship turning into something other (I hate phrasing 'something more', love isn't more than friendship, love is different), but I can't see them being sappy. And one of the two good fics I've found about them is spoiled by Prentiss willingly and readily leaving the BAU, the department she fought so hard to be in, to get married and have kids. No. Just no. Not in this show, not in this team.

There should be some point in this entry, but I can't find it. All I can say in the terms of ending the entry, Prentiss is awesome. And hot as hell. And she feels to me like bi leaning gay, but with a huge crush on Hotch. Which makes her somehow even more awesome and hot.

Comments

[helgawinter]

Hm. Got an idea here. Just from the top of my head, totally not thought through, but still.

As far as I can see it, Hotch would never get involved with Emily while they're still on the same unit. He just wouldn't, it's unethical and unprofessional, not only they're co-workers but because he's her boss. So in order for them to get together one of them has to leave the BAU. But if Hotch really cares about Emily, he won't let her sacrifice the job she fought for so hard and is so good at for his sake and the sake of their romance. As her boss, he has the necessary resources to stop her. So what I'm thinking is that if the push finally comes to shove, he just might take the promotion or get a transfer. Here are the reasons as I see them:

1. Family is of a great value to him, has always been (I still believe that he might have left in the beginning of season 3 if Gideon had shown up to take charge of the team) and after what happened this season this value could only grow. So if he ever gets another chance of having a family again, he might take it.

2. Before this season there was no one who could leave the team if Hotch left and he knew it. As I said above I still believe it to be the main reason he stayed on with the BAU when Haily so desperately wanted him to leave. He wanted to stay, sure, but the fact that the team needed him was a much stronger reason than his own wish. Now there's Morgan who proved he can be entrusted with the leadership so Hotch is no longer irreplaceable and he knows it.

3. If he and Emily do even so little as admit to each other their hypothetical feelings, they still won't be able to work together after that. It would be unprofessional (and they both are enough of a pro to know that) and compromising to the job. One of them would have to leave anyway, breaking up the unit - so it seems only sensible to make the best of a not very good situation and at least stay together as a couple, because otherwise the unit would be broken up for nothing.

And, btw, come to think of it, I'd really love to read that kind of story: where Hotch and Emily get together, but it's him who leaves the BAU, and she stays on. I don't know, it just feels right to me for some reason. :) Like, more "in canon" than the other way round. :)

I don't know if I'm making any sense here. :)

[helgawinter]

The 1st sentence under point 2 should read "...there was no one who could LEAD the team", of course, not "leave". :)

[svollga]

...I LIKE it! Now I wish someone would write it :)
It makes sense that while Hotch couldn't leave when Haley pushed him to, he could actually leave the team now, with Morgan and Rossi ready to take it over.
And he could still be consulting the BAU. Haley was openly against it because she was afraid he will go back, but Emily won't be - she would probably encourage it, as he is so good in what he does.

Thinking of other options here... would it be fraternization if Emily moves to another BAU unit? This team isn't the only one. Granted, it's painful to break it, but... Though I'm not sure if both parents working in the BAU are good for children, with the hours they all keep.

[helgawinter]

I second the wish :) Not much chance of it being written, though, I'm afraid :( Unless one of us takes this up, of course :)

...would it be fraternization if Emily moves to another BAU unit?
Um, if I remember correctly Garcia was worried about breaking the fraternization rule after being caught with Kevin and they were assigned to different departments at the time - so I guess, yes, it'll still be fraternization.

But I kind of like the idea of Emily being the one who stays with the unit and Hotch taking another position with the FBI or even outside of it. I kind of like the scenario in which the characters have to make that kind of choice - and the man being the one to make changes in his life, not woman, because it would make more sense for him to do so than for her. And this pairing and this fandom is the perfect setting for that kind of thing. :)

...now the only one we're missing is someone to write that story for us. :)

[svollga]

Yup, I like this idea, too. This couple - this entire cast, actually - has all the qualities to break the gender norms and usual narrative. We already have it with JJ and Will :) I would like to see it played with Hotch who is this perfect male WASP on the surface...

...now, please, dear universe, make some good author write it? Please?

BTW, have you seen the last episode? Emily for the win!

[helgawinter]

Oh yes, I did. Here's finally an episode I really really liked :) Too few of these lately. And Emily totally rocked! The way she talked to Morgan at the end - just loved it. :) And the way they so casually slipped her in wearing that red dress, showing that she's not just smart and professional but also a very beautiful and classy woman... awww! Loved her :)